Where to start....
It would probably be best to start where everything ended. At least that was what I thought. I would've never imagined that this was just the beginning of the best thing that could have happened to me.
December 2016, a week before Christmas, I had my heart broken. Like really broken. I scared the shit out of my mom, my sister and my best friend, when I was crying on the phone.
(Back story - 2 years together. Ended everything in a 15 second phone call. No idea we were unhappy....Heads up, gentlemen, if you are unhappy just bloody well say it. We won't go too crazy.)
Anyway, my world, now, was flipped on it's head. What next? Well, obviously, I cried for the next week. Dehydrated myself and just to piss myself off, my brain played that phone conversation on loop until I didn't cry anymore and was numb to the entire exchange. A quick shout out to my girl Kat, the K in my SMaK, who came running to my side when I called her and her parents for taking me in when everything went sideways. They invited me to their home for Christmas and showed me unconditional love, compassion and shared in some belly aching, tear-jerking laughter.
After Christmas, I spent the next 3 months hibernating and rarely going out. Work was my savior. Pretty sure productivity shot up at least 1%.
Fast forward a few months, I was having dinner with an old friend and we were sharing our love life war stories. She asked if I was dating again, I told her no, I wasn't ready. She said I had to get out there again, even just to get used to the whole thing. I told her I wasn't doing Tinder again, but she promised it was better. Queue entrance music, Welcome to the stage...BUMBLLLEEEEEEEE. Oh yeah, I did it! Swiping left and right, but it was different this time!! I mean, I was in control of who spoke to me and messaged me vulgar things. The next few months were such a hoot! I had so many adventures. The best was, one night I got a call from... a friend I had met on Bumble. It was early April, he wanted to hang out, it was midnight. So, whatever, I went over got him and we started driving. We ended up back in Surrey at White Rock and went for a walk on the pier. On our way back, we were trying to decide on what to do next. It was roughly 3 am when I came up with the genius idea to go to Squamish. So, we swung by his place grabbed his wallet, got some gas and headed on this adventure. Long story short, we got into Squamish at 530, realized there isn't much to do there and kept going to Whistler. Got to Whistler and everything was quiet and cold. I was warm, but homie was only in a T-shirt and jeans. So, we went back to the car, tired as all hell and decided to come home. Such a random night, but probably the most fun I had in months.
After that moment, it was like an awakening. I felt like myself again, after a long time. I may have been changing back to the old adventure seeking, late night drives, and crazy ideas me.
It was during this moment I decided to take Edna seriously. You can read why and when I started Edna on the About page. I had done a few hacks on sweaters and sold a bunch to people at work and laced up some leggings. So began the research. Trying to find what my style was, what I wanted to put out there, what image I wanted Edna to be associated with. We were trying to be an affordable brand, but expect quality from us. Not everything needs to be ridiculous expensive to have quality associated with it. Soon after ironing out these details, I met with my good friend Sarah, a graphic designer and all around amazing human. Self-employed, I wanted her take on business and how to get started. She gave me some awesome ideas and pointed me in the correct direction as to how to get started. I had a momentum and was off. My next stop, get a coffee. I flew over to friend's coffee shop. They had known what was happening in my life and were/are such big supporters of mine. I walked in and saw Jessica, one of the 2 people I was looking for and not to mention an excellent photographer, and started in on what I had just taken on.
Over the moon that I was going to be selling my stuff, she came up with the grand idea of putting on a fashion show at the coffee house. Coming out with a bang and showing everyone what Edna was all about. She didn't even have to sell me on it, I was ready for this. I needed this. Keep in mind, this entire exchange happened over a span of 1 week, from starting a business to hosting a fashion show. Now the race was on. All my spare time was being dedicated to researching summer styles, BC business start-up, and what all would be required to host a show.
The next couple months flew past, before I knew it, June was here, it was almost my birthday and work was hosting it's semi-annual sales training. Usually not a big deal for us lowly employees, but it never hurts to look in and see who is visiting us from around the globe. (International accessibility company. If you need a wheelchair lift or home elevator give us a shout). Walking down the hall at work, you can look into the boardroom and what a glorious morning, the specimen that sat in there was quite a site. Aussie/English mix, guess he couldn't decide on which one and young (different for the elevator world). By the time lunch rolled around everyone was talking about "the one with the haircut". The following day at lunch, he sat with us at our picnic bench, shout out to my lunch crew, and we got to talking.
I had met the male version of myself.
The Aus and I hung out a couple times while he was in town and told him about the past few months. For someone I had met only a few days prior, I knew I had found a very good friend. When I told him about Edna, he was the first person outside my group that was such a huge supporter and was genuinely excited for what I was doing. I know you are reading this and thank you for everything, you good looking son of a bitch!
Late June and my show was approaching fast, like one more month to go. I had set up and organized majority of the show, started working on a website with Sarah's help and started social media pages with the help of another dear friend. I was well on my way. A couple weeks leading up the show, I started creating my patterns for the show. 21 pieces to be exact. I took 3 days off work and sewed all the pieces. Special thank you to my girls, I am forever grateful for you both, Moral Support and Patella Syndrome.
The show day arrived and it went off pretty much without a hitch. Thank you to the people that helped with the buildup, the models, who were all friends and family and all the people that tuned in via Facebook Live from around the globe to watch. I learned a few things from that event, who my real friends are and that family isn't always related to you and some that are related to you, would rather cut you down than support you.
The next month was interesting. I had some hits on my site and social media was doing alright, but I wasn't getting any orders. September rolled through and still nothing. The site was slow and social media was pretty much dead in the water. To say I was depressed about Edna would be an understatement. I had such a high and then nothing. It was early, but the reaction I initially got I thought would keep going. But it was a harsh slap by reality. I wasn't sure if this was something I wanted to continue. For those of you thinking I overreacted, you need to understand. Having people tell you that this scary endeavor you have taken on isn't going to work or being brushed off as nothing, coupled with having no hits on your site, has quite a hefty toll on your confidence.
Then September 22, the single worst day of my life since 2001. It was the day that I would meet the one person that has changed my life. But I had no effing clue at the time.
Enter BigHead, a ridiculously talented artist. We worked together, I had no idea who he was, but he knew of me. At our annual lunch, he asked for my number and I had no way of turning him down nicely, so I gave it. So, so, so unsure about the whole thing. Lucky for me and my indecisive ass, my amazing girl Nina, who also has an amazing blog, was privy to the whole exchange. She asked what happened and I told her and she said take the plunge; what did I have to lose. Right?
This turned out to be one of the top 5 decisions I ever made. BigHead helped turn my entire perspective and confidence around in Edna. He helped with my logo, my site updates, business cards, general ideas and the push to not give up just yet.
As the new year turned the corner, I decided I was going to focus on Edna, really grow the business.
In approximately a month, I've grown the business twice the size it was from when I initially started. And we are still growing strong.
The reason I'm telling you this is because I want to inspire change, in our thinking, our actions, our mentality of who we are and what we put forth. I want to change how we present ourselves and how we feel about ourselves. How we present ourselves on the outside is a reflection of how we feel on the inside. I dress like a scrub when I feel down, I know this. But when I'm feeling myself, well hot damn--just kidding. Sort of.
I should've had a bullshit 2017, but I didn't. I chose to make it a better year for myself. I chose me. Anyone could have a bad year, but it's how you choose to continue that defines you. Have a moment to cry, embrace those sad feelings, but use that as your fuel to chase your dreams and make your life better. You are never late to the dream chasing cult.
Thanks for reading my shit--much love Edna ;)